so, second year was officially over two days ago when I finished writing my Culture, Society and Individual exam (I still love how the acronym for the course is CSI - makes me feel scientifically smarter HAHA). not sure if I wrote a good argument or I started to believe my own bullshit, but I think I did pretty well during that 2 hours of endless writing. and so it was, the last exam of my undergraduate life. for my third year I will only submit examined essays. yes, essays and not a dissertation. I just don’t trust myself writing a dissertation, though I know it’ll make grad school so much easier if I do it now. but ‘easy’ is not a challenge, isn’t it? and I like to challenge myself because I’m so cocky like that.

regardless, hello un-summer-like summer!

seriously, there is something wrong with the weather. sun, y u no come out?

moving on, I’m pretty much jobless now. I still haven’t secured an internship yet and strangely enough I’m cool about it. in the worst case scenario where I can’t find anything, I still have my student ambassador job, The Leopard and I will probably help Abbie and Jessie out at Neverlazy. and I can always go back to decorating the house, writing poetry and short stories, brushing up my Japanese and Korean (I’ve given up on Mandarin, I think), and playing guitar. singing la la la la, let’s all sing! la la la la hallelujah.

for sure, in the next three weeks Imma be lazing around, going to film screenings, exhibitions, musicals, concerts. simply submerging myself in enjoyable, cultural life. then from june to october, I have no idea. no travel plans as of yet, but definitely not going home this summer. no big deal, though I won’t deny that I really miss Jakarta and its people.

Jakarta Jerkarta. not sure which one I miss the most:
- eating rice for breakfast in front of the TV, watching news/gossip. OR having coffee and croissant with mom at the Starbuck’s in her office.
- lunch at my grandparents. OR ‘cafe talk’ with best friends.
- street food hunting. OR second-hand shopping.
- sushi tei. OR bakerzin.
- salihara. OR taman ismail marzuki.
- driving. OR taking a cab.

june to october. dayum, five months of freedom. or lack thereof.

as much as I feel the pressure to find work to make my CV more polished, I don’t feel the need to rush it. not rushing, hm perhaps not quite a good thing to do in an instant-obsessed society like this. whatever, I enjoy embarking on a journey, it gives you time to prepare. then to reflect.

yada yada yada.

I don’t know much about how you’re supposed to mature, but I think as I grow older, my view on life has become more hippie-ish. it’s like when all Jason Mraz’s songs make sense to you and you live your life according to it. haha, guess it is safe to say that I’ve become the curbside prophet’s follower. speaking of Jason, I really like his new album. not really a fan of I Won’t Give Up, I prefer Be Honest. I also like the psychedelic feeling of 5/6 and The World As I See It but my favourite’s gotta be Who’s Thinking About You Now?, which apparently is also Jason’s favourite track as well from this album (Y).

what else what else. one of my cousins is getting married in november. he’s only 24. wow. I still can’t picture myself getting married at 24. to be honest, with this kind of eccentricity and semi-workaholic-ness, it is more likely that I’ll still be single at 30 (the average marriage age for women, according to The Telegraph), but I suppose it isn’t so bad. besides, there is never a cosmic mandate for people to get married, why so anxious?

here’s a picture of a swan.

went to greenwich park for matt’s belated birthday picnic today. (picture taken by an unknown guy, using abbie’s camera)

[DISCLAIMER: Nindy, the writer of this article, is a 20-year-old second year Media Communications student who has finally come to terms with being uncool. Yet, she still has high hopes that someday or in another life, she will finally be cool.]

Thick-rimed vintage glasses? Yep.
M83, Foster the People, Kings of Convenience, Bat for Lashes, Sigur Rós on my iPod? Checked.
My granny’s summer dress, leather oxfords, electric blue nail polish? Yes. Yes. Yes.
My favourite book? Certainly “The Dharma Bums” by Jack Kerouac.
Sipping organic green tea latte while tumblr-ing on my Mac? Sounds like a perfect day to me.

Uhm, pardon me for being so stereotypical, but I’m sure that if we think those statements above are inaccurate descriptions of ourselves, at least we know one person who actually fits the portrayal. And considering I’m at Goldsmiths, knowing only one person with such attitude and lifestyle is quite impossible.

Anyway, what is it about these hipsters –yes, I just used the ‘H’ word– that make them look so distinctive?

What is it about those indie darlings that make other people strive to become just like them?

How important is it to become ‘cool’?

Speaking of cool, maybe it’s the only explanation why many people have chosen to embarrass themselves by wearing glasses with no lens on (yes people, you DO look ridiculous on that, but if it makes you feel any better, you’re slightly smarter than that Matthew guy who tattooed a pair of sunglasses onto his face –go on, google it).

Furthermore, just admit it, even when you act like you don’t care whether you’re cool or not (exhibit A, yours truly here), I bet deep inside your head –or heart, whichever drives you more– there is still that silent wish of being seen as ‘cool’ by others with your “I-can’t-be-bothered” attitude. No?

Perhaps cool is the reason behind every Apple product that you and I own (oops ;p), which gets me to my next point. Although the main tenet of the so-called “hipster philosophy” is resistance to the manipulative capitalism’s mass culture (I’m sure Adorno and Horkheimer would be proud), but by being as ‘original’ and as ‘indie’ as possible, aren’t we actually practicing a culture of ‘niche consumerism’? That being said, then the only difference between ‘the masses’ and us is that we buy our clothes in Rocket or Urban Outfitters and not in TK Maxx or Marks and Spencer.

I guess that should leave you all with something to think about. After all, being witty and intelligent are another ‘cool’ requirements, eh?

So, think about it and be cool.

so, i managed to go through two decades without getting pregnant, using drugs, being expelled from school, fighting with my parents, getting into a dramatic cat fight with friends….yep, i guess that is worth celebrating for!

thursday, january 26 2012. finally twenty. TWO-ZERO.

so the day started with a squeaky surprise from my beyond-awesome flatmates at midnight. (yes, i said it was ‘squeaky because of the squeaky stairs to my room at the attic, which means that i could actually listen to their footsteps as they were coming in. LOL. but still, i find it surprising! i thought they were gonna use the bathroom LOLOLOLOLOL. thank you, matt, abbie, and windy!)

(cutting the cake with gusto, indeed. thanks for taking this pic, matt! and anak labsky, YOI BRO ITU BAJU BINTAMA!)

yes, chocolate cake at midnight. one was so ready to use this day to eat as many fatty foods as possible. stuffed, nearly killed to death by chocolate, we spent an hour watching City of God. (it’s a mindfuckingly awesome movie, you should totally watch it)

then bed.

the rest of the days went almost like usual, the only difference being the amount of birthday wishes i received that day (d’oh), some friends at school said it personally, me likey. while some also said it through sms, whatsapp, twitter and facebook, me lovey some witty messages…such as this:

some messages on the cards are also lovely. such as this, from the rest of the ForeverAlone house’ people (my flatmates ;p):

a fan of mine (yes, i’m not being cocky here. he, himself admitted of being a fan of my writings -not of the writer. hahaha) created this kinda-sorta-maybe scary myth about cats and death which turned out to be a hoax made just to ‘ruin’ my birthday mood. hahaha dammit abang, you got me! penggemar macam apa ini? ayo kirimin kopi acehnya!

my best friend of 14 years even dedicated a post on her tumblr. whoa, dude…one does not simply forget that kind of effort.

coolness. defined.

thank you thank you thank you thank you.

then party.
yeah right. as if.
being a party veteran (so long, those crazy nights in high school!), i chose a more ‘intimate’ activity: EATING. hahaha. i decided to treat my closest goldsmiths friends a dinner in ed’s diner in soho, the one opposite waxy o’ connor (if you haven’t been there already, this place is worth visit. it used to be a church, but today it’s one of the coolest bars in london, IMO.)

thank you, 谢谢, cảm ơn bạn, 감사합니다, terima(ke)kasih, FRIENDZZZ!

one and a half hour later and there we were, stuffed and nearly dead by burgers, cheese, and mouth-gasmic MILKSHAKES.

no shit, epic meal time! (this hasn’t include jun-eun-joyce’s meals btw)

the night was young and so were we ;p but the grannies and grandpas (and not to mention, the overdosed tummy-monsters) in all of us seemed to force us to call it a night (IT WAS….7.30pm-ish?!) so…we….went home.

watched the rest of City of God, replied some more wishes…and there went my first day of official ‘adulthood’.

and so far, it’s going good :)

so these are what i got for my birthday from everyone: friends and family.

i love them all, but…gotta admit that my favourite present is the customized tumbler with pictures of my friends. it’s simply epic. LOVE IT. A LOT.

LOL. michael’s face is such an attention grabber indeed.
ingrid’s message: Forever Alone No More. Soon.—> bangkeeee :))))
nicole, my bitchhhh hahaha. awesome hair!
love abbie’s face and peeking jun! hahaha

thank you thank you thank you.

yesterday was beyond legendary. awesomeness level: ASIAN (pun intended, yes LOL)

okay, let’s move on to the cheesy-but-true part:

you see, i’m not the type of person who gets excited on their birthdays and i can’t say any better how the idea of having a birthday party scares me. but all of those greetings, presents, surprises (and this year…it’s been the third year in a row that i got birthday surprise! *holding my tears*), and simply the presence of YOU people….i just can’t thank you enough. i feel blessed.

you see, blessing is….the awesome moment when you have the best people to be your best friends.

life is pretty. so…adulthood? challenge accepted!

good night and be good, good people!
i love you!

i am done with all the works. i have my essays printed and copied into cds. 4 days/nights (in which one weekend was sacrificed) of works and 5,364 words in total. oh yea, mission accomplished!

as for the production log, i’m actually finished. but haven’t printed nor copied it into cds cos i’m still not sure if i was doing it correctly. i asked my tutor for a sample, but she said she wouldn’t give it before today (friday), i dunno why, but in that case then i’ll have to ask my filmmates to email the sample to me, see if i need to change anything then email my housemates here to print it. aargh so complicated lah, i personally don’t really like this idea.

also…the school has announced the option specialization for next term. turns out i didn’t get into film fiction. so sad laah.

well, it wasn’t really surprising actually, i kinda know that since i’m quite inexperienced in this whole filmmaking thing, my chance is slight. but oh well, i was pretty confident that i’d get in anyway because my pitch was quite epic, in my opinion. haha. so this means that i’d get in script/prose-writing, which is fine and i like it as well, plus, i have more experiences in this writing and scribbling business so chances are, my future would be brighter if i choose to be a writer (that rhyme was unintended, btw). but yeah, there is still a little disappointment of getting rejected.

but on the bright side, there goes the first half of my sophomore year. gosh, it feels good that this term is finally over.

another good news, i’m coming back this christmas! WOO HOO! so what i need to do now is to pack my stuff for jekardah. hell yeah i’m so excited!

all my bags aren’t packed (yet) BUT i’m ready to go….

so, fellow jakarta darlings, imma be seeing you in the next few hours. let’s take back the city!

(btw, i am not sorry for the t.o.p gifs overload ;p)

when you found out that you’ve done your production log the wrong way.

and since you still have time to re-do it again, your brain is telling you to do so. but…looking back at the effort that you’ve put into the previous work…and the thought of having to re-do it again…

(this is the original draft of my article that was posted on the November 2011 issue of Goldsmiths’ The Leopard newspaper. only minor differences in the opening paragraph, but the content remains the same)

-

I’m one of those weird perfectionists who dedicate too much contemplation on the first sentence of every writing piece because I always believe that first sentences determine everything that follows. Simply by reading your first sentence, for example, people might get twice excited to read the whole piece or vice versa, they might quickly decide not to go on to your next sentence. First sentence is like first impression, it lingers. It matters.

Nevertheless, this is not a literary article about the importance of first sentences, nor is this an article about relationship. Oh, actually come to think of it, this is indeed an article about relationship. But it is not about the romantic relationship. This is an article about the relationship between local and international students.

Being an international student has always been familiar to me because I have experienced it since I was very young. One thing I have been noticing from these experiences is that there is always this ‘invisible’ gap between the local and international students. In other words, there is some kind of marginalization of the international students.

Of course it all comes back to the individual whether s/he feels marginalized as an international student or not but generally speaking, based on my experiences and observations, to a certain extent, international students have always been discriminated against. This discrimination can take up in many forms, from racial discrimination (although less likely to happen now, but still occurs some time) to a sense of alienation in which international students cannot fit in with the society.

Regarding the latter, I would like to say that it is a matter of prejudice. Ignorance is caused by lacks of knowledge. This goes both ways for local and international students. After all, it takes two to tango, am I right?

It seems to me that there is this widespread assumption among local students that international students do not want to blend in, that they prefer to be with the people from their own country. Whilst this assumption is somewhat true, then there lies a bigger issue: why does it happen? Why do international students stick together with the people from their own country or with another international students? Is it them who do not want to mingle or is it the local students who are not really keen on socializing with international students?

I believe this has to do with cultural differences. I am not going to elaborate on the possibility of lifestyle differences and contradicting values; something as simple as language barrier, for example, can already create a gap. Whereas different English language skills obviously create miscommunications, often, different accents can already create gaps and certain prejudices. Language skills can really make someone feels superior or inferior to others but to tell the truth, it is not something to fuss about.

Now for my fellow international students, we cannot always blame the local students and/or the school if we feel like we are being discriminated. Tell me, how are you supposed to make friends with the local students if you are always in your own comfort zone? True, it is hard enough to settle in a new country, learn other culture and maintain good grades at the same time. Yet going to school abroad is not only about the academic achievement, but also the life experiences, how you manage to overcome your fear of unfamiliarity.

Another possibility why there is a gap between the local and international student is that perhaps, none of us feel like we have to interact with each other. Since it is unlikely that we will end up in the same work environment, as most international students will come back to their home country after graduation, why bother making connections? Well, although it can be said that university is a stepping-stone for your future career (in which it would be great if you start networking with the people you might end up working with), but you go to university to make friends with everybody! Moreover, who knows, this could be our last chance to learn about other culture considering we might end up in a homogenized work environment in our native countries.

Lastly, referring back to my opening sentences, I think the same tenets cannot always be applied for this circumstance. Most of the time, our first sentence –first thought or first impression– I should say, does not establish the things that follow. It is inclined to be inaccurate. Thus I would like to finish this article with a food for thought, using quote from Mark Twain, “The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice.”

Now go out and make friends.

Nindy is from Indonesia, with prior school experiences in Australia and Canada.

and it’s a wrap!

finally, after 3 weeks of planning and story development (which included several days of revise and more revise of the script and the storyboard) , we were able to shot today. and thankfully everything went smooth, although some minor problems did occur (and by minor, it means: where is our script? oh, i thought you printed it. oh, i thought YOU printed it. SHIIIIT. okay, i’ll go and print it).

of all three groups in our class, i think our group is the one who shot first. and the tutors said they are really happy of our hard works so far. oh well, we managed to do the planning-scriptwriting-casting-shot list-paperworks, yada yada yada- EVERYTHING quick and organized stuff ahead of ourselves, which is good because now we have extra time in editing it :)

i don’t mean to jinx this, but i’m pretty confident with our work. i believe this first project will turn out good. amen to that.

i’m also really happy with the group i’m in. there were doubts at the beginning, but everyone turns out to be really hardworking and dedicated to this project, yay yay!

angus, as our producer (he’s the guy doing the lighting stuff in this picture), is super responsible and takes charge of almost everything, simply the committed producer every film crew wish for.

fahima (pictured here with steven, the cameraman), our director is very good at instructing people -as directors should do. great great, good good.

cindy (the girl with the giant headphone on her neck), our sound editor is also very devoted, or i should say, she knows how to take advantage of having a brother, who is a film maker. HA! she also sorted out the paperworks template (agreement, shot list, etc etc) that our documents seem sooo…professional haha. not to mention, she’s our make up artist!

steven, who has been working in film sets in china, turns out to be a good cameraman (and casting director as well!), although some time he liked to choose a risky shooting angle, but so far, the footages we’ve seen are fine. so, it should be okay.

as for jaleesa (the one with the “peace” pose), she’s the one behind all this. if it weren’t for her idea, we might not have this “insomnia” project :) not to mention, she is also our editor, cannot wait for her turn to make our footages a masterpiece!

as for me, with the lack of film production experience (as compared to my team mates), i’m pretty much doing logistics haha. off set, i’m actually assistant producer, whose job is to print off all the stuff, communicating with the tutors about our progress, managing the props we use for the shooting and by far my most “production-related” contribution is the storyboard i made, haha. anyway, on set i’m the boom operator (if you have no idea of what it is, the picture should be self-explanatory, but anyway, a boom operator is the guy who hold the microphone, basically)

so, i think that’s pretty much the story of the day. i know i’ve been posting lots about today’s shooting. yes, it’s because i’m so excited about doing tv/film production. where else, you can be stressed out but still having fun at the same time?

ah, i can’t wait to edit and move on to our next project: documentary film!

did the shoot for our first short film today. being a boom operator for a day, holding a long arm boom microphone on my neck and shoulders are tiring, but shooting a film was super fun!

will post some of the pictures taken soon soon soon (i mean soon like, right after this post!)